Quick: What do you get when you cross a cabbage with a radish?
Hahahaha, okay, actually the answer I was going for was kohlrabi, but I can see how the punchline is pretty applicable. Kohlrabi, it’s truly astounding how you managed to combine all the wilty limp dickishness of cabbage with all the bitter exhaust of radishes. Plus you look just like one of those not-really-scary alien things that killed all of the unnamed red-shirted Starfleet crew members back in the day. I swear I killed you multiple times playing Space Invaders. So what the fuck are you doing back on my plate?
Seriously, can you spot the difference?
Kohlrabi, you’re up there with bok choy and daikon radishes and jicama - foods that didn’t exist when I was a kid and frankly shouldn’t now. New doesn’t mean better. And no one exemplifies this better than kohlrabi. You taste like Skrillex sounds: painful, unmistakeable, and with occasional screaming in the background.
2/10. Go back to your home planet. We don’t like your kind around here.